13 August 2012

ask alli: is Matt vegan?

Chances are, if you know me, you've asked me this before.  So has everyone else.  It's a popular question.  I think it's a polite way of saying, "Come on.  Be honest with me.  Doesn't Matt ever wish you would just cook him a steak?"  A valid question.  I don't begrudge you for feeling curious.  Well.  Does he?

There's more to it than just a simple yes or no answer, but I can begin by saying that no, Captain Adventure is not vegan, and no, he doesn't wish I would cook him a steak.  Conundrum?  I think not.

Matt grew up in a meat and potatoes family and was gifted with an I'll-try-any-food attitude.  Well, any food that hasn't been left in the fridge for more than 24 hours.  He doesn't like shrimp or lettuce.  That's about it.  Anything else, he's game.

I went vegan just shortly after we started dating, when we were around 21 years old, and he supported me from the very beginning.  It was pretty incredible, actually.  Matt's not your average guy.  You can tell because your average 21-year-old American guy would've hurled a string of questions a mile long at me every day, starting with, "Where will you get your protein?  Where will you get your calcium?  Where will you go out to eat?  What if there was a cow that was totally happy and the farmer was really nice to it, would you drink its milk then?  What if there was a chicken that was totally happy, would you eat its egg then?  What if there was a BEE that was totally happy, would you eat its honey then?  What if there was a sheep that was totally happy, would you wear its wool THEN?  WHY THE F*** NOT?!"

Look!  He walks on water.  LEGIT.
This is why Matt is the best husband of all time.  There's not a judgmental bone in his body.  His attitude toward my decision to go vegan was basically, "Of course.  How could you not?  I'll support you because being vegan will make you happy."

He maintains the same stance to this day.  Over the years, he has lost his desire to eat pork because - in his own words - pigs are just so smart.  He's started choosing vegetarian options when he eats out, and when we go out together, he usually gets something vegan so we can share.  He eats whatever I cook, which is always vegan, and doesn't complain.  In fact, he genuinely likes my food (especially the cupcakes).  Lately he's been eating tofu every day for lunch at work.  I asked him for a list of his favorite vegan foods that I could include in this post, and he said there are too many to remember.

He'll still eat meat and dairy occasionally, and thus, Matt is a testament to the relativity of labels.  Most of his meals are vegan or vegetarian, but he doesn't need the name to be conscious of what he's putting into his body.  He takes everything in moderation.*

Plus, he would hate being that person who has to say, "Oh, thank you so much for making this meal for me, but I can't eat any of it."  You have literally never met a nicer person.  Matt physically cannot appear ungrateful.  Once when I sneezed, Matt, who was out like a sack of potatoes, sleep-mumbled, "Bless you."  THAT is how deeply ingrained his kindness is.  Because cooking him a steak would make me unhappy (to say the least), he wouldn't even consider the possibility.  Just like Data cannot use contractions, Matt cannot want me to cook meat.

So now that I've had a chance to explain, my answer is that Matt may not be technically vegan... but what's in a name?

* Hot dogs are not part of that moderation.  The day you see Matt eating a hot dog will be the day he eats without washing his hands first.


  1. Thank you Alli for this fantastic insight into the one and only MLedder! Loved it!

    1. Aw, Matt Hagen! Thanks! I'm sure you could have written a short bio of him yourself. It would've been nerdier, but very enjoyable. :)

  2. I know the answer, but I think people might want to know your insights. Ask Alli: is Dish vegan?

    (this is totes Seestor)

    1. Oh, good question. I'll definitely post on that!