09 October 2012

Bloomington: LUSH

Advanced Vegan Beauty.  This is a 300-level class, noobs.  (Sounds better than, "This is an ad for LUSH."  Which... it is MOVING ON.)

As of this moment, your only option in the Twin Cities for LUSH is that black hole of consumerism, the Mall of America.  LUSH is the only reason I ever go there.  That, and DSW.  But!  There's hope for us yet - a new LUSH will open soon at 50th and France in Edina.  One mile from my apartment.  Goodbye, paycheck!  Hello, seriously concerning vanity issue!

E-112 E Market St
Bloomington, MN 55435
(952) 854-9672

LUSH really blows my skirt up, as my mom would say.*  I have like 500 million LUSH products around here, all of which are upstaging Dish (left) with happy little Vs signifying their vegan manufacture.  I... might always want more.  Dish might too.  For different reasons.  Like eating.

So LUSH is, first and foremost, a really cool company.  Around three quarters of their products are vegan.  Their website is plastered with text about how hard they fight animal cruelty in the industry.  They have recycled packaging and waste-free products.  You'd be hard-pressed to find a more sustainable company this successful.  I have a larger-than-life consumer crush on LUSH.  Can you tell?

The only downside is the steep price, but you most definitely get what you pay for.  Not only are the ingredients amazing in origin and quality, but they combine to give you a completely incredible product.  Their Big shampoo and Veganese conditioner really do make my hair look fantastic.  The Rockstar soap actually produces more lather than you've ever seen.  And all the stuff I use on my face genuinely suppresses zits and makes my skin glow.  Oh, and it all smells and feels amazing.  No, extraordinary.  Or, like world peace and winning the lottery and Felix Felicis.

I'm fighting the urge to begin several tangents about LUSH - I must control myself, find my center, and be organized.  Like a tree.  Or something.  Can't talk about these products all willy-nilly!  We'd be here all night!  Instead of going through each product one by one, I'll tell you how to shop here, whether you're a guy or a lady.  It's really tough.  Ready?

Walk inside.  Wait for approximately half a second.  A bubbly LUSH employee will tell you everything you ever needed to know and answer every single question you have about any beauty issue and point you toward the correct products for you and maybe even give you a facial and a free sample.  You'll probably find the meaning of life in there somewhere.  I give you permission to place 100% of your trust in your LUSH barista.

As Matt walked around taking pictures for me, one of the employees stopped him.  I mean, stopped him from taking pictures.  They wanted to know if he was from 3M or some other corporation - apparently people have tried to copy LUSH products by checking ingredients at the store.  Captain Adventure put her mind at ease - he pointed to me and explained that his poor wife was spending her annual one day out from the institution about the blog - and the LUSH rep relaxed and encouraged him to keep snapping.

I can't resist telling you about my favorite LUSH item: Lust solid perfume.  The ingredients say there's jasmine involved, but all I smell is pure love.  There's something so fun about applying scent with a little stick instead of spraying it on.  Oh, and you know how walking through the perfume section of a department store is totally sickening?  You could sample LUSH's perfumes (right) all day without barfing.  I know from experience.  That was a good day.

I rewrote this post several times - what you're seeing is a very abridged version.  If you have any questions about LUSH and/or have xenophobia and don't want to ask your LUSH representative, feel free to ask me and/or see a therapist.

* She'll deny it.  But I got that phrase from SOMEBODY who gave birth to me, and it wasn't my doctor.


  1. So totally catching up on your blog....I may have to go to this store and check out the mascara...seriously.

    1. I haven't tried their mascara! I bet it's amazing. Let me know if you get any, I'd love to hear how it is.